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Old 01-09-2010, 09:48 AM
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Exclamation Karen Carpenter & Related Topics

Just recently, I noticed they were screening the life story of Karen Carpenter - one half of the popular group "The Carpenters" on one of the True Movie channels and it got me thinking about the unrealistic expectations for women to be pin thin in modern times.

What a very sad state of affairs where Karen was concerned. She passed away at a young age - 32 in fact - from a heart attack which was brought on by years of excessive dieting, causing untold stress to her heart. Karen was never genetically geared to be slender but it seems that one typically irresponsible comment in the newspaper set her on the road to self-destruction when a reporter called her the "chubby" sister of the Carpenter duo.

I'm not for one moment suggesting we should celebrate obesity but nor should we realistically be condoning skeletal-like physiques.

European and American women, by and large, are consistently preoccupied by how much they weigh thanks to a "diet" of airbrushed images of the so-called perfect woman. These are images that very few can live up to and some set themselves on a very dangerous course to achieve the perfect physique.

As someone who had been unnaturally slim for the first 30 years of my life thanks to an undiagnosed overactive thyroid gland, I have been on both sides of the fence. Once my thyroid was treated I began to gain weight and now have to mind what I consume so as not to gain too much. The question is, how much is "too much"?

Few people realise that the 1950's pin-up Marilyn Monroe was a European size 16 which, in today's society would be considered bordering on obese. It's tragic.

Karen Carpenter was 5'5 or there abouts and sustained a weight of 120lbs until 1973. Is it worrying that I find that weight acceptable? I am 5'8 and weigh 113lbs. But when Karen got very weak she weighed around 80lbs which is decidedly underweight.

What do we find acceptable these days? Does society really want to see skeletal women on the catwalks? What do you men think is acceptable? I realise it is a very "close-to-the-knuckle" subject but I happen to think it is worthy of discussion and sensible discussion at that.

I'd like to also discourage younger members from dieting fads. It NEVER looks cool to be stick thin guys, seriously. Hopefully some members will confirm that curves are good (and I am working on getting some curves back myself)
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Old 01-09-2010, 11:32 AM
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Another thought provoking topic, Lo.

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank you for buying me the Carpenters double CD set (along with other gifts) for Christmas. It is tragic about Karen Carpenter. It is especially tragic if, in fact, she brought about her demise as a result of a reporter comment.

As for a proper weight, I like to use opinions from friends as a guideline. For example, I know I am too slim. If someone didn't like me because they thought I was skinny, I would consider that person quite shallow. If I overate because someone thought I was skinny, I would consider myself easily swayed. One must be comfortable in one's own skin. The proper weight is what one is comfortable with, I think.

I'll be interested in comments from other members.
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Old 01-09-2010, 03:08 PM
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Good topic.
It was tragic about Karen Carpenter.
Many girls especially feel they have to compete to be thin, starting at such a young age in some case as well.
Unfortunatly the way things are. I find it quite sad seeing these girls who are so thin and size zero, it is a fact a lot do copy fashionable magazines and models.
It seems that is beginning to hopefully change though. I personally think skeletal woman on the catwalks do not look good. Fact is that how so many strive to be like in many magazines and clothes shows push it.
As Ruum says you should be comfortable in your body, unfortunately people are shallow, I never judge people myself many do though which is really so wrong.
I tend to put on weight to easy yet I try not to over eat. went through a phase and comfort ate through things, that too is not right but sensible eating is.
I need curves, mine are all in the wrong places. I want to lose some weight; I will never be skinny though.

One friend of mine thinks she is far too thin and wants to be bigger, she think she is unhealthy yet a size 10-12 to me is quite the norm and average sizing
To be that thin in just not healthy, it cannot be. I too would discourage young teens to diet uncontrollably, there is no reason not to be healthy and slim not a stick. some do look really ill
It is a different story if it is illness of course or you are naturally slim.
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Old 01-10-2010, 11:27 AM
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Yes, it is totally sad that many of us feel "fat" unless we are a size zero.

I still feel bad when I gain a pound or two and no matter how many folk tell me I am slim I still see myself as huge
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Old 01-10-2010, 02:15 PM
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I struggle with my weight which made me more depressed. Now I live with it and I know I will never be skinny.
The Meds I was one made me gain a lot, no excuse like when giving up smoking, I am still trying but eating right foods there is an even healthy balance
Given to eat more fruit now and nothing at night after Dinner. . I walk my dogs two hours a day almost as well, Plus the Wii

Lo you are not fat!!!. You are slim Pound or two is nothing, Huge never. You always seem to eat the right foods too.
What on the other end of the scale people weighing so much they can not move that is so sad. It must be in the main what they eat to get like that.
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Old 01-11-2010, 09:02 AM
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I struggle to seperate reality from my mindset, Gillie.

I get quite angry when my brother tries to force feed me. He comments all the time about how much I do or do not eat so it is of little wonder I tire of it.

The point is that women in the UK are either fat or thin But the FACT that we are being consistently commented on is something I find unacceptable. It long since stopped being a health issue - it is a fashion statement and one we all subliminally seem to harbour....
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Old 01-11-2010, 10:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lo View Post
I struggle to seperate reality from my mindset, Gillie.

I get quite angry when my brother tries to force feed me. He comments all the time about how much I do or do not eat so it is of little wonder I tire of it.

The point is that women in the UK are either fat or thin But the FACT that we are being consistently commented on is something I find unacceptable. It long since stopped being a health issue - it is a fashion statement and one we all subliminally seem to harbour....
I understand exactly what you are saying. I can see how you must tire when food is mentioned all the time, you have a food issue, I do know where you are coming from in the mindset issue.
If we all complied to being that one size would be so wrong, it is usually in our Gens, as in tall or shorter we are unique.
I find it quite ridicules when some so young too, go out purposely to be that thin as if it is normal. Girls as young as 8yrs think they are fat.
look at the woman's clothes stalls although I don't go in the very young shops, average is from size 8 up. Jordon is a size6. We should be who we are of course it is not always the case at all.
I would like to be slimmer it is true, I will loose some llbs I will be happy

Last edited by Gillie; 01-11-2010 at 03:39 PM.
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Old 01-12-2010, 02:29 AM
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This country is obsessed with weight in truth.

I am pretty sure most men prefer a woman with a few curves but unless I can get into a size 6 pair of skinny jeans I am almost morally forced to find myself obese

All around us are images of exceptionally thin women - even the gaming charater Lara Croft has a waist so small that one is forced to ponder just where she stores her internal organs LOL
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Old 01-12-2010, 03:46 AM
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Nothing wrong with a few curves, despite what the ads would have you believe. Things get so unrealistic once they get handed to the artists to "touch up".

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Old 01-12-2010, 04:28 AM
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I probably look like the airbrushed model to everyone else after stringent post-Xmas dieting but when I peer into the mirror I see a whole different thing.

It is these images that are wreaking havoc on females. Many of us are far too vain or far too brainwashed to maintain a healthy weight. And the more we talk about it, the more focussed we get on weight loss.
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Old 01-13-2010, 02:35 AM
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And the more we talk about it, the more focussed we get on weight loss.
I hate to say this again, but...stop talking about it then! You posted the thread.
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Old 01-16-2010, 01:09 PM
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I hate to say this again, but...stop talking about it then! You posted the thread.
You are absolutely right.

It's a bit like non-smokers I guess...etc

I apologise without prejudice.
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Old 01-16-2010, 01:41 PM
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You've no need to apologise to me. It was an observation.
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Old 01-16-2010, 03:20 PM
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i dont know if this is relevant but im trying to gain weight but it just doesn't happen & its annoying cz my elbows are weirdly boney
yesterday i was out with a "friend" & all of a sudden she just went mad & said shut the chuf up u skinny rat & i was like................ o...k? thnx for the evil insult & stormed off because i told her on our lunch break i hate being skinny & shes goes and said that
any tips on gaining weight people?
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Old 01-17-2010, 05:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tombraider1best View Post
i dont know if this is relevant but im trying to gain weight but it just doesn't happen & its annoying cz my elbows are weirdly boney
yesterday i was out with a "friend" & all of a sudden she just went mad & said shut the chuf up u skinny rat & i was like................ o...k? thnx for the evil insult & stormed off because i told her on our lunch break i hate being skinny & shes goes and said that
any tips on gaining weight people?
It normally comes with age. I was very slender for many years and teased relentlessly. My legs were so stick thin I refused to wear shorter skirts and even skinny jeans were so wide for me that I had to open the seams and take them in. I learnt to sew at an early age because I wanted to be fashionable and fill my clothes like my peers did!

Honestly, the teasing will stop once you get into the adult world and people will admire you for being slender. You don't want to encourage weight gain and anyone who teases you is undoubtedly envious, trust me.

Friend, Ruum Taedor is also very slender as you can see by his avatar. I doubt he would want it any way but he has a super fast metabolism because he eats small amounts regularly throughout the day, right, Ruum? I struggle to eat breakfast which is wrong because if you just eat once a day your metabolism slows down (not that I reccomend this for gaining weight as it is very unhealthy).

Celebrate your slender frame! The western world are full of people literally "dying" to be thin and you can presumably eat all you like without gaining an ounce. That's something a lot of people desire, even though a lot of obese people won't admit to it. All this "fat and happy" mentality? I don't buy it for a second. I bet if you offered a wonder pill to an obese person they would take it without hesitation if they thought they would wake up a size zero the next morning! (no offence to anyone carrying a bit of extra paunch ).

I've watched documentaries about folk who can no longer do anything for themselves - they weigh so much they are immobile - stuck in bed for years with the most dreadful bed sores. Some have to be lifted from their beds via cranes, it is extremely sad

I'll leave that thought with you before you wish yourself to gain weight - it will come as you mature I am sure. If not then think how much healthier you will feel and how many turnstiles you can squeeze through without paying hehe
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Old 01-18-2010, 09:13 AM
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omg thanks Lo ^.^ u made think of it in a better way meens a lot
& 4 the meanies il just tell them i can use the the 50p toilets in the mall for free xD
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Old 01-18-2010, 11:30 AM
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omg thanks Lo ^.^ u made think of it in a better way meens a lot
& 4 the meanies il just tell them i can use the the 50p toilets in the mall for free xD
LOL and, you are most welcome
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Old 01-18-2010, 11:11 PM
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...Friend, Ruum Taedor is also very slender as you can see by his avatar. I doubt he would want it any way but he has a super fast metabolism because he eats small amounts regularly throughout the day, right, Ruum?
I'm hoping you didn't mean "I doubt he would want it anyway". I'll assume you meant "any other way".

Yes, I have a slender build, and I tend to eat more often throughout the day. Tombraider1best, ignore people who have a problem with your weight (unless they are well meaning). I am not the strongest guy in the world, and I am underweight. However, let me list some of the things I can do. I can think, and I did well in my education, and have done well in my employment. With proper footwear, I can walk for hours and suffer no ill effects. My mild breathing problems prevent me from jogging very far, but I can sprint faster than my friends. I can play a half-decent game of badminton or racquetball. I am an excellent driver with the maximum number of merits on my license. I can keep the driveway of an elderly couple clear of snow all winter (although the ol' back and arms protest somewhat). I value being a relatively health whole person. For these things I am capable of and more, I am thankful.

I rambled on a bit, but the point, tombraider1best, is that your weight (or lack thereof) should not been viewed as something negative (unless it is extreme and is a health issue). As Lo says, celebrate your slender frame. I have no doubt you'll become a contributing member of society. I'm all out of pep for my talk, but if you need more, I'm sure I can find some.
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Old 01-18-2010, 11:33 PM
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Good advice and you were right about my meaning "any other way", sorry!
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Old 01-19-2010, 12:55 AM
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wow! Y'all rock ^.^ thanks
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Old 01-25-2010, 06:13 AM
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Karen Carpenter - one of the greatest female vocalists of all time.
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Old 01-25-2010, 06:33 AM
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Karen Carpenter - one of the greatest female vocalists of all time.
Oh she was simply unique, MyImmortal. She didn't even smoke as far as I am aware and yet she had that gravel-type tone that could even send a deaf man to sleep!!
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