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Old 03-16-2010, 07:47 AM
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Exclamation "Facebook Murder" - Why FB are NOT to Blame.

A 33 year-old man was recently arrested for the murder of a 17 year-old girl whom he met on the social networking site Facebook. It transpires he had two previous convictions of a similar nature.

Apparently, he was posing as a 19 year-old man and he "lured" the victim into meeting him where he proceeded to commit his dastardly crimes, resulting in her ultimate death. No names, no pack drill here..I do not wish to scaremonger younger members.

However, as usual, the UK news stations are holding Facebook responsible and whereby I don't wish to start a political war of words, I think it is important enough to warrant an adult discussion about Internet safety.

My guess is as good as yours but one thing I would suggest is that this man was not making himself visible to other friends on this girl's Facebook page - he was likely communicating with her in private via Facebook's PM facility.

But we are not talking about a young child here, we are talking about a 17 year-old girl who allegedly defied her parents and kept her dealings with this pervert private.

The news stations were quick to blame Facebook for having an insufficient report facility when it comes to abuse. But if such a facility were in place, I highly doubt it would have been utilised by this girl for she took the decision to meet him - nobody forced her into that decision and had she felt in any way compromised she would not have taken those fatal steps, surely?

It truly angers me how the Internet and it's affiliates are somehow always held responsible

Facebook are renowned for their "Stay Safe" policy but ultimately, that poor girl must have added him as a friend even though she didn't know him. She then spoke freely to him and agreed to meet him without telling anybody.

When I was 17 I was in a very responsible position within military circles - I certainly wasn't in the mindset of say, a 12 year-old but that doesn't mean others of this age aren't naive. Even so, how can Facebook be held accountable? It's no different to meeting a bloke in a nightclub and allowing him to walk you home - save the fact you have a true picture of him in terms of his true age, not that this makes one iota of real difference of course.

Before the establishment of the net, we had other means of making friends - pen pals and lonely hearts columns. The danger will always be out there but it's high time people took some share of the responsibility for themselves and their actions instead of grieving relatives seeking to point the finger at the likes of Facebook - a site, I may add, that has the admirable facility for users to delete undesirables from their list, making it impossible for them to view your status and messages etc...

Any thoughts?
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Old 03-16-2010, 08:00 AM
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The girl was stupid. Did she even see a photo of him, or talk to him on the phone? That's creepy. I would never meet anyone outside my non-Facebook circle of friends without first talking to them, even if it's on the phone or on Skype, or webcam, etc.

Natural selection, baby. Putting aside the weakest and stupidest so the rest of us can prevail.
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Old 03-16-2010, 08:09 AM
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Originally Posted by Helegad View Post
The girl was stupid. Did she even see a photo of him, or talk to him on the phone? That's creepy. I would never meet anyone outside my non-Facebook circle of friends without first talking to them, even if it's on the phone or on Skype, or webcam, etc.

Natural selection, baby. Putting aside the weakest and stupidest so the rest of us can prevail.
Well I wouldn't like to use the word "stupid" but I would say naive my friend.

Yes, she saw a photo but clearly not one that represented him. I know most of my Facebook friends and at 41 years of age I highly doubt I would be considered rich pickings for the average paedophile in spite of my gorgeousness

Seriously though, she really should have gone along with a friend or at least told someone of her plans.

Let this be a lesson to others by all means. It isn't the first and it won't be the last sorry story but the point is, we can't hold the social networking site to account. People have to take responsibility for their own actions at some point. Facebook are not accountable for this poor girl's decisions at the end of the day...
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Old 03-16-2010, 09:30 AM
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This is exactly why the Internet is so dangerous. It allows people who have devious intent to appear as sensitive and kind, loving people that can turn around and make things like this happen. Facebook is not to blame, the girl is. I'm sorry but if you're too stupid to tell your parents about something like this (going to meet a guy you met on the Internet) then there is nothing that can spare you the 'humiliation' of people saying "I told you so" as a result of what happened. People can do this anywhere. It's not limited by any means to Facebook.

Is the UK suggesting that forum sites or any social medium could be blame for this too? I mean c'mon seriously, a PM from a forum site could have the same effect...you never know when it's the Internet and you and everyone and everything you know is masked behind a computer.
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Old 03-16-2010, 09:34 AM
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This is news?

It's the girls fault. Simple as that.

But I don't have FB, and don't plan too. So what the hell do I know.
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Old 03-16-2010, 10:45 AM
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Originally Posted by Nemesis296 View Post
This is exactly why the Internet is so dangerous...
Although I agree with your sentiment I am actually one who thinks the Internet is safe so long as users abide by a few simple principles

For example, if you want to meet a like-minded partner then do NOT join a dating site. Join a forum instead. I hardly think that a predator would waste time "grooming" members of say, a gaming forum

I have met many a friend from specialist forums like Eidos. I have come into harm once I admit (via the net), but at the end of the day I was at fault, even though it really was a very bizarre set of circumstances and the person in question was a representative of the UK Police force.

Never trust a copper, ergo
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Old 03-16-2010, 11:44 AM
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Any tool can be used or abused. It's the use it's put to be the individual that's at fault.

That said, what an awful story.
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Old 03-17-2010, 08:59 AM
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Yes, it was a bit grim mate.

But folks should really be a little bit more cautious. There will always be undesirables but they don't usually hang out on open forums, they tend to be a little more devious and underhand (predatory).

My advice to others would be to exercise caution on these social networking sites and only add people that are known to you.

With Facebook, one has the option to remove/delete friends although there should be a report facility I suppose so that users can be tracked and cautioned for abusive behaviour.
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Old 03-17-2010, 11:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Lo View Post
Although I agree with your sentiment I am actually one who thinks the Internet is safe so long as users abide by a few simple principles

For example, if you want to meet a like-minded partner then do NOT join a dating site.
It's interesting that I say the Internet is dangerous and that people shouldn't trust other people they meet solely on the net, which probably makes me the biggest hypocrite of all; I met my girlfriend of almost 2 years online and we've been the happiest as could be since we met. Though we ended up being from the same hometown and went to the same high school, we never really connected until meeting online...it's possible, but I also know that there are a lot of people who enjoy nothing else but to make people miserable with false promises and faking being something they are not just because they can get away with it.

I agree that the Internet is safe, but the idea of following simple principles gets even some of the smartest people (who don't know how to use technology) into trouble because of others looking to take advantage of those without the know-it-all.
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Old 03-17-2010, 12:43 PM
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The Internet is no more dangerous than any other facility where it concerns meeting people. End of.

People who are determined to cause harm and people with a hidden agenda will find ways to execute harm upon a person regardless of the methods they use. Period.

It is up to the potential victim to exercise caution, sadly
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Old 03-18-2010, 03:21 PM
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Sad story Lo. There are definitely some sickos out there.

As far as facebook is concerned, I do use it but you do have to be sensible about it. I have my settings adjusted so that only my friends can see my information, I never accept a friend request from anyone who I do now already know. I also will delete someone further down the track who I feel has only added me to "build their numbers".

Young people, you have to be smart. Remember there is safety in numbers. Never go home or anywhere with someone you have just met. Don't take the attitude of "it will never happen to me", thats what the last person it happened to probably said... If you go anywhere, always have your mobile (cell) phone with you and have it within quick access.
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Old 03-19-2010, 06:54 AM
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Hi Sophia! How lovely to see you!

How's things? You can add me on Facebook if you would want to - I'm dead funny me hehe Lo Archer is the name and writing funny posts is me game lol
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Old 03-21-2010, 02:51 PM
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Children below 13 are joining FB.
Yesturday my mum took me and my 6 year old sister to the cinema, a group of kids aged 11 were there and they were talking about sexual topics BECAUSE of fb, it was bought up in the conversation alot, eventually i ended up telling them to shut up because if my sister repeats that it is their fault, and it is illegual for them to be on the website.
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Old 03-21-2010, 03:46 PM
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I agree, Lo. Facebook cannot be held accountable for such incidents and the users should be responsible for their own actions and safety on the Internet. It seems that a lot of these people just don't want to take that responsibility and would rather find a scapegoat to blame when it all goes wrong for them and the media is all too willing to back them up.

Despite their outcry, it would be extremely difficult for Facebook to be able to remove all false accounts and underagers because they simply can't tell who is who.

I believe that a lot of parents can be to blame for kids such as the ones you speak of, Gitb, but at the same time, there are also many parents who can't be blamed since kids are sneaky and will find ways to do what they want regardless. Especially now that they can access the internet via their phones.

Although I think that this poor girl's death was horrific and sad, I agree with many people here, that it was her own stupidity that led to it. I am not saying of course that it was her fault that she was murdered - that man deliberately set her up and he shouldn't have been out and able to do that in the first place considering his criminal history.

But when she saw the man and he was clearly not the person she had arranged to meet, she should have walked away instead of believing his story about being the father of the lad she came to meet. And under no uncertain circumstances should she have got in a car with anyone she had just met, whether it was the guy from the pictures or not.

Kids are made well aware of the dangers of going with strangers from a young age and these days are also made very well aware of the dangers of the internet. When they choose to ignore those warnings for whatever reason, people cannot blame sites such as Facebook.

Even if they did get rid of Facebook, kids would find new ways to meet strangers and talk about sex and monsters like this murderer would just find other methods to get to their victims.
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Old 03-22-2010, 02:11 AM
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Facebook can't be held responsible for this anymore than google could be held responsible for child pornography or people that are pirating media at the end of the day its the end user.

It's definitely a sad story but hey the world is full of sad stories and full of happy ones. I look at this as merely a reminder for the rest of us to keep our head in line, because meeting people online isn't as dangerous as they make out as long as you use simple common sense precautions such as telling friends (or parents depending on your age) what your doing, meeting in a busy open public place and bringing a friend.

Oh and pepper spray doesn't hurt :P
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Old 03-22-2010, 03:23 AM
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Oh and pepper spray doesn't hurt :P
Yes it does. That's the point
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Old 03-22-2010, 04:14 AM
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Children below 13 are joining FB.
Yesturday my mum took me and my 6 year old sister to the cinema, a group of kids aged 11 were there and they were talking about sexual topics BECAUSE of fb, it was bought up in the conversation alot, eventually i ended up telling them to shut up because if my sister repeats that it is their fault, and it is illegual for them to be on the website.
I'm thinking of only joining FB to report them all.
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Old 03-22-2010, 01:25 PM
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Pepper spray is actually considered a lethal "weapon" in the UK and ergo, it is illegal to carry.

Knives, and unlicensed firearms are also illegal.

Instead, we usually roam the pubs and clubs carrying a wet, three-week-old kipper in our handbags so we can fume the perportrators into submission
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Old 03-23-2010, 07:16 PM
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Pepper spray is actually considered a lethal "weapon" in the UK and ergo, it is illegal to carry.
lol, probably a good thing since the chavs and kids would be using it on just about anyone for a cheap laugh. The police carry it, but from what I've seen on RoadWars and NightCops, they need it.

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Instead, we usually roam the pubs and clubs carrying a wet, three-week-old kipper in our handbags so we can fume the perportrators into submission
I find the river cobbler can pack a good slap.
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Old 03-24-2010, 06:58 AM
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Incidentally I too watch those programmes and you are right, they do need it to disable drunken thugs like me

Seriously though, the tedious job of patrolling the city streets on a weekend night is far from admirable. It's all so predictable - we have a real drinking problem in the UK and it's quite embarrassing to see the Brits abroad

That Benidorm series just about sums up a cross-section of British society. "Wheres the bar" and "I can't eat all this foreign muck, where's the chippy"
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Old 03-24-2010, 08:30 AM
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lol, I know what you mean. We're kind of an international laughing stock because of the youths today.
Although, saying that, when I was in Spain, I saw a fair few spanish people who were equally as bad as the brits for drinking themselves silly.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:31 AM
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How many people have to die for people to realise that FB needs safer security stuff

im not trying to say im smart or anything but i only add people i know, random adds = DELETE
the only website i trust is this one.
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Old 03-24-2010, 11:02 AM
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How many people have to die for people to realise that FB needs safer security stuff

im not trying to say im smart or anything but i only add people i know, random adds = DELETE
the only website i trust is this one.
You're right, but how will Facebook know what is real and what's not? That's the problem here. When you talk about the Internet from a realistic and basic standpoint, everything that passes through Facebook's servers is just data. That's it. All they can do is program algorithmic filters to prevent certain descriptions and such from being added to people's profiles, but there is absolutely no way that Facebook can become smart enough to know that the person typing on the keyboard is lying about their information.

This boils down to people having the know-how awareness that people with horrible intent do exist out there, and their parents need to educate them to be on the lookout for them. It really doesn't get any more simple than that. The Internet has no face, just a bunch of text and images which can influence a person to think one way and not the other. How they are interpreted on the other hand, is all up to the person's intelligence and ability to sense danger when it appears.
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Old 03-29-2010, 07:42 AM
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I re-iterate that it's up to the individual to exercise caution.

Facebook won't feed you, wipe your bottom nor protect you from predators because the data isn't processed like that, as Nem says.

It's a sad reality that predators will always exist no matter what. It's up to every individual to protect themselves, ultimately.
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Old 03-29-2010, 07:52 AM
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i think its mental how some people can pretend to be othersss, just to murder someone or attack them, why would someone want to do this

and just curios but how do i stop random people from seing my pics please(on FB) bcause apparently, this person has been nosing on my profile
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